Were they all planned?

I am expecting my 6th baby.  Compared to the rest of America, that's more than will fit in your car (plus 2 parents)! However, in my kids' world, our oldest son once told me we had a small family- compared to the rest of the families in our home school group. 

I have been asked many times if we "planned" our babies, and how many more do we "plan to have".  It used to be that I never knew how to answer such personal questions, especially when they came from people I hardly knew.  But God has planned my family.  He knew each of my children even before they were knit together within my womb.  So, the answer is YES, each of my children were planned.  Each one was planned by our loving Creator and given as a gift to my husband and I.  Have I been surprised by God's plan, at times, yes, but God's plan has always surpassed my own expectations.

We cannot wait to meet our 6th baby and see what God's plan is for this little soul!

Natural Family....Planning?

"What's in a name?  That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet."  Maybe Shakespeare has it right, but I don't really like the term "Natural Family Planning".  Don't get me wrong, I am an advocate of using a woman's fertility signs to determine fertility to either try to achieve or avoid pregnancy, it is only the name I dislike.  Natural Family Planning sounds too much like Catholic Contraception.

I just don't think that we (humans) should be doing all the planning.  I have found that so many times in my life, I have made plans, but God had something different in mind.  I worry more than I should, and trusting God completely has been something that I have had to work on for many years.  It is difficult to take that leap of faith, to "let go and let God."  There are just some things though, that cannot be planned, but God in his wisdom allows them to happen. No one plans infertility, for example.  I have known several Catholic couples who planned to have children, and even thought they might have many children, only to discover that no matter how well they charted and planned, pregnancy was never achieved.  And even when we do get it "right", there is still the possibility of a pregnancy that ends in miscarriage or stillbirth.  What about unplanned pregnancies?  Are they a mistake?  Did NFP fail?  Has Planned Parenthood has sold the lie to Catholics as well; we are always in control, we can choose exactly when we will have 'X' number of children, and there will be no surprises.  But, does each pregnancy that a woman has need to have been planned ahead of time?

I like to think of Fertility Awareness.  For some reason I seem to hear this term more often in secular circles.  But I feel that Fertility Awareness accepts and respects a woman's fertility.  It is good for women/couple's to be aware of their fertility. Our fertility is a gift from God, and He has given us the knowledge of how a woman's cycle works.  We can then use this knowledge to try to achieve or even avoid pregnancy.    In my own marriage there have been times that we felt we needed to avoid pregnancy, but then there were other times when we were just open to God's will, not necessarily planning to get pregnant.  Every act of intercourse during the fertile time of a woman's cycle does not equal pregnancy (although many times it does). 

I wish that the Church would promote a more God centered Fertility Awareness model rather than a woman or couple centered Planning model.  Catholics, let us learn to trust our gift of fertility back to the God who gave it to us. 

Awesome new Website

I recently came across the website: www.iusenfp.com

It is a great site about NFP (Natural Family Planning).  The site is fresh and appealing. I love their graphics!  I have been following the development of 1flesh.org and came across a link for iusenfp.com.

Check out these sites!

Breastfeeding and Fertility

Well, I heard it again.  "I got pregnant while breastfeeding.  That was a lie, that breastfeeding keeps you from getting pregnant."

I know that I have written about this before, but many women still don't understand how breastfeeding and fertility work.  Dr. Sears put together some great tips:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/2/t023700.asp
as does La Leche League:
http://www.llli.org/nb/nbsepoct06p196.html

The thing that is not mentioned in the above articles and where, I think, women who get pregnant while breastfeeding, run into problems, is they cannot meet all the criteria listed.  Many women are working, or pumping and cannot follow the exact "rules" for Lactational Amenorrhea.

Where things can get really tricky, is that we usually ovulate before we get a period, especially when breastfeeding has been interrupted, by a mother who works and is pumping, introducing solid foods, baby nursing less often, etc.

For women, who like me, have to work and pump breastmilk for our babies, can we rely on breastfeeding to prevent pregnancy? Or what about women whose babies are more than 6 months old, but still breastfeeding and cycles have not returned yet?

I have been using NFP (Natural Family Planning) and breastfeeding to space my babies for the last 7 years, so it has become second nature for me.  But, if you are not familiar with NFP or FAM (Fertility Awareness Method), you may not be observing for signs of returning fertility while breastfeeding.  I think that is the answer and the key to breastfeeding and preventing pregnancy, to be watching for your body's signs that ovulation or fertility is returning.  This link describes the signals that our body gives us before ovulation.
http://www.babyhopes.com/articles/naturalfertilitysigns.html
I have had 4 babies, and with each of them, I observed a definite change in cervical mucus before my cycles and fertility returned.

So, yes, breastfeeding can prevent pregnancy, but like many things in life, you must read the "fine print".  There are rules to follow and if you cannot meet the criteria, you can start observing natures signals and signs of fertility.  The bonus to learning NFP or FAM is that when you do wish to get pregnant again, you will know exactly when you are fertile.

Looking for study participants

This study is looking for participants on Natural Family Planning with the Creighton Model.

www.facebook.com/ceibastudy
http://medicine.utah.edu/dfpm/Research/CEIBA/index.htm

Hormones

I find it a little ironic that women will pay extra money to buy organic and avoid hormones in food, but will then pay money to take hormonal pills everyday.

With so much talk of breast cancer and heart disease in women, I am surprised that this fact is so often overlooked.

See previous posts on Natural Family Planning and Fertility Awareness Methods.

Natural Family Planning Method As Effective As Contraceptive Pill, New Research Finds

Natural Family Planning Method As Effective As Contraceptive Pill, New Research Finds

Breastfeeding and Family Planning

As a follow up to my last two posts, I have one more before moving on to a new topic. I have encountered many women who have had trouble with breastfeeding their new baby due to their choice of birth control.

If you are breastfeeding you should not also be using artificial hormones to prevent another pregnancy. The hormones in birth control pills and IUDs can interfere with milk production as well as be passed through your milk and to your baby.

It also cannot be assumed that just because you are breastfeeding that you cannot also get pregnant. While breastfeeding can and does delay ovulation, there are conditions to lactational amenorrhea:

• exclusive breastfeeding (no supplementing or pacifiers)
• first 56 days post-partum
• OR after the first 56 days if you have not had a period AND are also monitoring cervical mucus (this is because your body will often ovulate before you have your first period)

Women who are breastfeeding exclusively can have many months of infertility (and no periods) before their regular cycles return. What is often forgotten or misunderstood is that the body ovulates before it menstruates, so unless you are watching for the more subtle signs of ovulation you may miss them and become pregnant.

My solution to the above concerns is Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) or Natural Family Planning (NFP). This natural way of monitoring for fertility avoids hormones that can interfere with breastfeeding and can help the breastfeeding mother to know when her fertility is returning.

Please see earlier blog posts for more information.

Fertility Awareness to Avoid Pregnancy

In my last post, I discussed using Fertility awareness to achieve a pregnancy. The same techniques can be used to avoid pregnancy as well. "Fertility Awareness Method" (FAM) or "Natural Family Planning" (NFP) is a great way to monitor your fertility and to be aware of the way your body works.

If you want to use FAM to avoid a pregnancy then abstinence is required during the fertile period. This is much different from the old "rhythm" method, Cycle Beads, or other methods that rely only on counting days of your cycle. These methods presume that you have a regular 28 day cycle with ovulation on day 14. FAM monitors for signs of fertility on a daily basis, thus there are no presumptions or guessing.

On a personal note I have been using NFP for the past 5 years. I have been successful at both achieving pregnancy and avoiding it. I love that I'm not taking any artificial hormones (in the form of birth control pills, injections, or IUDs) into my body. I like knowing what is going on in my body. I feel a greater sense of "control" over my body functions as I know when I'm fertile and when I'm not. I know that my body is working properly and I'm not suppressing it with hormones and their side effects. While there are IUDs that do not have hormones, I would still rather not have the risks of infection, torn uterus, or ectopic pregnancy that go along with them.

I'm always surprised that with so many people these days that want to be environmentally friendly, eat organic or natural foods, and be "green" that more couples do not know about NFP or FAM. To me this seems like a great way to live naturally, to avoid taking chemicals into your body and to save money! FAM only requires paper and pencil. My husband and I have been very happy with this method of family planning and I love telling others about it too! It is healthy and natural.

www.mymonthlycycles.com
free online calendar and charting for fertility

Trying to get Pregnant?

Let's go back to the very beginning....getting pregnant! While we all know "the birds and the bees", many couples have trouble getting pregnant. There are many reasons for infertility which I won't address here. What I want to focus on is how to track your cycle and fertility to increase your chances of getting pregnant.

A woman's body cycles every 28 days (+ or - a few days). Her body gives signals as to where she is in her cycle. The menstrual flow is considered the beginning of the cycle, peak fertility occurs at ovulation (usually occurs in the middle of her cycle) and then the cycle wanes and the menstrual flow begins again. How do you know when you are ovulating? While there are tests (similar to pregnancy tests) that can tell you when your hormone levels are high, these can be expensive.

Your body gives another signal that it is preparing to ovulate and this is cervical mucus. You may have noticed a white vaginal discharge from time to time, this is your cervical mucus. Cervical mucus changes preceding ovulation to be more abundant, clear, stretchy, and lubricative. These changes in mucus can be observed and charted. While the egg that is ovulated only lives for 24 hours, sperm can live for up to 3-5 days inside a woman's body. The longer life of sperm gives a patch of fertility rather than just one 24 hour period.

The other sign that a woman has ovulated is basal body temperature. Daily temperatures are taken are recorded at the same time every morning. There is a temperature spike after ovulation occurs.

These two signs can be used together (or mucus alone) to help a woman determine the optimum time of ovulation and optimum fertility.

For more information:
www.creightonmodel.com
www.ccli.org